


''you best hope it makes a damn good story, prettyboy.'' (down the gravel road).

by RuffledCrow



Category: Percy Jackson and the Olympians - Rick Riordan, The Heroes of Olympus - Rick Riordan
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Implied Childhood Sexual Abuse, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Minor Character Death, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Multi, Rating will change, Suicidal Thoughts, Underage Drinking, Underage Drug Use, feelin's and shit, haunted au, i need an asprin, just bros in love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-10-20
Updated: 2020-02-18
Packaged: 2020-12-24 13:37:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,992
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21100340
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RuffledCrow/pseuds/RuffledCrow
Summary: Nico doesn't believe in ghosts.Or at least, he didn't.*I'm going to edit and polish what I have at some point, but for now, it may seem a bit funky, in relation to the linear timeline (that's really not) and the placings of events and scenes, so don't worry, I promise it won't stay that way.





	1. rango likes cheeze-itz, and i'm not high enough for this fuckery

**Trigger Warnings for this chapter:** _Underage drug use, (brief, non-graphic or detailed) mentions of suicide and suicidal thoughts._

  


  


  


They say you can find _ it _, down in Myeburn forest. 

  


Myeburn is the kind of forest your mom warns you about, the kind of forest _ that little boy _ goes missing in. It’s where the scary old man lives, where that murky old river runs, and where things stare at you from the trees. Cults sacrifice (because there are just _ that many _cults in Nowheresville, Ohio), people commit suicide, and the demons whisper at you from the shadows. The drainage pipes are portals to hell, and that old shack down by the lot of old dryers is where witches go to practice (or the delinquents go to get busy on an old couch with rats in it). 

  


But, 

  


If you go down to the little patch of forest, a bit off the old gravel road at midnight (it’s _ always _ midnight), they say you see _ something ( _ they don’t specify what). You see _ it. _ Whatever wants to devour your soul, or your best friend’s, or whatever. It offers you something, grants your deepest wish, gives you something you _ want. _ Good looks, an A on your Algebra test, cooler parents, riches, fame, fortune. You name it. _ It _ asks for some kind of payment ( _ ‘’one human soul, express, cashback, please.’’ _ ) and boom. There you are. But, rest assured, whatever you gave as payment to whatever was asking _ will _come back to haunt you. And you’ll probably be dragged down to hell. Irrelevant, really. 

  


Well, Nico can tell you from experience, it’s bullshit. 

  


He was thirteen, bitter as hell, and sad. He wanted his sister back. So, he snuck out of his (adoptive) parent’s house at eleven, went down that scary, loud-ass gravel road, and into that forest. Waited until twelve o'clock sharp, and, loudly, ‘’_ I want my sister back!’’ _

  


Waited a few minutes, for whatever _ it _ was to come a’ knockin’, asking for his soul, _ served hot n’ ready. _And,

  


Zip. Zilch. Nada. Nico still had his soul and his sister was still six feet under somewhere in Nevada, and he was still a depressed, ratty teenager in Nowheresville, Ohio. 

  


Irony was a cold bitch, too, because the scary little old man in that little shack ended up asking if he needed help, and, quite politely, asked him to keep the witchcraft noises to a dull roar. He and his pet cat, Rango, were trying to sleep. 

  


Irony was a brutal, _ ice-cold _ bitch. 

  


It would’ve been funny if he hadn’t wanted to _ die. _

  


Now, at age sixteen, it is pretty funny. _ Hilarious, _actually, because that little old man’s name is Joe, his cat, Rango, is cool, and so is he, and the idea that his little thirteen-year-old self had thought Satan would come asking for his soul in exchange for his sister’s is absolutely laughable. 

  


_ Satan has better things to do, _ Nico thinks. 

  


He sits with Rango now in the abandoned shack down by the dirty driers, smoking the last of his shitty weed. It’s not enough to get him high, barely enough to get him buzzed (he has school in an hour, anyway) but it’s maybe enough to get him through the day. 

  


_ Maybe. _

  


‘’You know, Rango,’’ He says aloud, limbs buzzing. ‘’I’m gay.’’ 

  


The cat knows this. He’s told the cat. The cat’s probably told Mr. Joe, too (they talk to each other, Nico’s sure), but they’re the only people that do. Well, sentient beings that know. 

  


The toaster knows. The walls of his room _ absolutely know. _His pillow knows all too well. 

  


But his parents are oblivious, his classmates are oblivious, _ the whole wide world is oblivious _ , and Mr. Joe and his cat are the only two living, breathing things that know, and, you know? The cat’s good at conversation. It doesn’t reply, and it’s great. And if he needs to tell it he’s gay because, technically, it’s the only thing he _ can _tell that’s breathing, whatever. He’s already the weird stoner kid. Who gives a shit if he talks to Mr. Joe’s demon cat?

  


(bianca would. but she’s disappointed in him anyway.)

  


Said demon cat doesn’t reply, just butts its soft little head against his free hand, meowing affectionately. It’s nice, he guesses. The demon cat is nice. 

  


‘’Yeah. Yeah,’’ Nico takes the last drag of his shitty, shitty weed in a shitty, shitty shack. ‘’I probably should get going.’’ He scratches Rango behind the ear, pushing himself up on shaky arms. He checks his bag; 

  


Lighter? Check. Dirty, beat-up spiral notebook? Check. Pencil he found on the floor? Check. Sketchbook that’s falling apart at the binding? Check. A couple of bandaids, bag of Cheez-its, few granola bars, a broken phone charger that only halfway works, headphones in the same condition, etc, etc. All there. He has his pocket knife, phone, his wallet, and Rango is eyeing him curiously. It’s familiar, (as is Rango meowing for his Cheez-its), and Nico would even chance to say it’s kinda nice. 

  


Wait, his clothes smell like weed. _ Shit, _where’s that damn cologne he uses to—

  


‘’_ Meow,’’ _Nico’s attention is drawn down to Rango, who is pawing at the little bottle. It would be creepy, but it’s Rango. It’s just a bit endearing, now. Cute, even. 

  


‘’Thanks, buddy.’’ Nico gives Rango a couple Cheeze-its as a reward, the cat meowing happily. 

  


Demon cats like Cheeze-its. 

  


_ God, _he’s not high enough for this.

  


He sprays the shitty cologne on his hoodie, _ just enough _to cover up the stench of weed. He hates the smell of it, but the alternative is being caught by a teacher or something. And honestly, it wouldn’t bother him, but his adoptive parents were decent people, and he doesn’t want them to have to deal with that. At anything, they seem to care for him, too, so he’d rather not get removed. 

  


Not that it matters, but you know. It’s there. 

  


The musty shack wasn’t much warmer than the chilly, mid-fall weather of Ohio, but Nico still pulls his hoodie a little closer to his body. It’s foggy outside, causing an eerie silence to fall across Myeburn. Rango trails behind him, though, and it’s a small comfort. 

  


He walks a bit through the thick trees, looking behind him every once-in-a-while to check that Rango’s still following. It is. 

  


Until it isn’t. 

  


‘’_ Shit,’’ _ Nico mumbles, walking a bit faster. He’s not far from the edge of the forest, and he’s ( _ mostly) _given up the belief that Myeburn is haunted, but getting mugged by a couple of druggies in the middle of a foggy forest isn’t on his bucket list. Nor is getting swallowed up by the trees, never to be heard from again. 

  


He ends up power walking the rest of the way. 

  


By the end, Nico’s shitty, garbage body is protesting, though, and he’s halfway coughing up his lungs from just walking half a mile quickly. It’s pathetic, and a few freshmen walking on the opposite side of the street side-eye him for it. He’s halfway tempted to flip them off, too, but he restrains himself.

  


Let the little goblins keep their innocence, then. 

  


The rest of the (much,_ much _slower) walk to school is uneventful. Nobody tries to talk to him, and Hazel’s probably off doing something with Frank. God knows what Jason is doing, or Reyna, but that’s just as well. Nico likes the quiet. 

  


(he doesn’t) 

  


It’s short-lived. Reyna is standing beside him, silent, as soon as he gets to the high school. She doesn’t talk, not much, but that’s part of the reason her and Nico’s friendship just _ works. _They’re able to hang out, totally silent, by each other for hours. And in the end, both of them leave in a better mood. Nico doesn’t know why. It’s just another one of those mystical, powerful things about Reyna. 

  


(nico’s not entirely sure she’s human, like how rango’s not really a cat, but still.)

  


‘’You smell like. . . a cat?’’ she asks, after a minute or so. Nico shrugs. 

  


‘’Rango.’’ Reyna knows Rango, too. She has an affinity for befriending strange cats. 

  


(she really, probably isn’t human.)

  


‘’Hm.’’

  


It’s all the conversation they have, posted up on the side of the school, before Jason arrives. 

  


‘’Hey, guys, ’’ Jason pauses, in his stupid letterman jacket, with his stupid, sweaty, perfect hair, takes a whiff of the air. ‘’Cologne?’’ Jason’s contorts into an awful, shit-eating grin. ‘’_ Aww _, Nico, who is she?’’

  


Ew. 

  


Jason ruffles his hair, Nico elbows him in the stomach, and Reyna side-eyes Nico. Because of course, she would. Jason’s gaydar may be more broken than Nico’s dignity, but Reyna’s a raging bisexual (jason doesn’t know that, either, nico would bet his damn flextape) and hers is in perfect, working order. 

  


Okay, maybe three sentient beings know he’s a flaming homosexual. Whatever. Jason wouldn’t know unless Nico actually showed up to school in nothing but a pride flag, groping some dude’s ass and singing David Bowie at the top of his lungs. And even then, Jason might still ask. 

  


Eh. 

  


He probably thinks Nico likes Annabeth. Everybody does. And he gets it, kinda. She’s blonde. She’s smart. A little pretentious, but she’s got the right set of mammary glands, Nico guesses, so nobody really cares. Except half the female population of the school, because she’s dating _ Percy McFuckin’ Jackson _ and _ god _ , they hate her. Nico does too, a little, but not in the way that she’s herself, it just comes with dating, _ arguably, _ one of the hottest guys at Nowheresville Highschool, home of the Cardinals. 

  


Again, _ eh. _

  


‘’It’s not for some dumb girl,’’ he says, glaring at Jason with what he hopes is the _ Might Of Zeus. _ It probably comes off more with _ The Might Of A Mildly Annoyed Cat. _Reyna’s lips press thin, probably stopping a smile as she stares dead ahead. 

  


Jason shakes his head, still wearing that same _ damned _grin, and he ruffles Nico’s hair again. ‘’Don’t worry, little dude. Your secret is safe with me,’’ Nico tries to elbow Jason again. This time, it hits home, and it leaves Jason slumping against the brick wall, gasping for breath. Nico flips Jason off, too, for good measure. 

  


Reyna smiles a bit, watching impassively as Jason’s glasses slide off his face, and he coughs his lungs up. Nico smiles a bit, too, and when Jason gets back up, he glares. 

  


‘’You suck, Nico.’’

  


And, like the child Nico is,

  


‘’You swallow, Grace.’’

  



	2. wherin i find out things i don't want to know

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> it's always like this.

  
  


Nico remembers meeting Percy. 

Well, not so much  _ meeting  _ Percy as much as, Nico realizing Percy was a person on the planet, and that Percy was good looking, and Percy was just.

Percy. 

Like all horrendously tragic, awful things, it started in the seventh grade.

_ (Nico was new to the school, Bianca’s death fresh and burning in his mind. Nobody would really talk to him, he didn’t know English all that well, and his hormones were a raging, all-consuming hellfire. He was mourning, sad, and horribly, pitifully awkward and angry.  _

_ Percy was in the eighth grade. _

_ Percy was perfect. Athletic, smart, kind, handsome. Nico was in denial, and Percy, unknowingly, was about to shatter that for good. _

_ All with one, simple, ‘’shit! Sorry, man!’’ _

_ Nico and his stuttering heart had ended up pressed against a warm chest, strong arms wrapped around him. His things had clattered to the floor, and he was Percy was looking down at him with cutely furrowed eyebrows.  _

_ ‘’Damn, I’m so sorry. You okay? I couldn’t see where I was going.’’ Their hands brushed in the rush to pick up Nico’s pencils in the crowded hallways. Nico might’ve actually been in a fucking cliche romance novel. They met eyes. ‘’New kid, right?’’ Percy offered, not waiting for Nico to reply. ‘’It’s a small school.’’ Percy handed Nico his pencil bag. ‘’Well, I’m Percy. Percy Jackson.’’ A tanned, warm hand was held out, and Nico had shaken it with his unhealthy-grey, cold one, brain buzzing.  _

_ Percy was beautiful.  _

_ With his warm, caramel brown skin, bright, sea-green eyes, and messy, bedhead dark hair, that was the only word Nico could use to describe him. He smiled naturally, easy, in the way Nico’s mother and sister had, and he seemed endlessly kind.  _

_ Nico was _ ** _ done_ ** _ for.) _

From then, Percy hadn’t stopped in his attempts to be Nico’s friend. And, over the years, Nico has come to accept that fact; as bizarre as it is, Percy is determined to be close to Nico, and Nico, for the most part, has let it happen. They now have the distant kind of friendship that comes with having Jason and Reyna as mutual friends. And, Nico guesses, that’s enough for him. 

It has to be, after all. 

But now, with his knee pressed against Percy’s, mid-way through a math lesson, it’s really not. 

It’s pathetic, really, how flustered Nico is. He has a shared math class with Percy, and because Percy just seems to like being close to people (he talks through touch, really) Nico suffers. Nico is never not blushing. It’s never not hell. 

(because he still wants to reach out, intertwine percy’s tapping fingers with his, to kiss that happy smile that seems ever-present on percy’s happy face, to just  _ be.)  _

To want things he can’t have, all from their knee’s brushing. 

_ (all from years of pining and denial and shame and  _ ** _want_ ** _ .) _

Now, though, Nico tries to take notes, as the teacher rambles on about triangles, or whatever. Percy taps his pen. Someone (freshman, probably) throws paper, and Nico decidedly tries to focus on anything that’s not Percy. 

It’s stupid, the way Percy can still make him feel like this. With the stupid butterflies, and the weird urge to smile for no damn reason. The way Percy fills up pages of Nico’s sketchbook, to the point Nico could draw his eyes from memory. 

It’s depressing, actually. 

And Percy’s  _ straight,  _ too. He’s dating  _ Annabeth.  _ And Nico could be falling for anybody else than  _ him _ , someone reasonable and not-straight (will, leo, probably), but it’s Percy, it’s  _ always  _ Percy—

‘’ _ Nico _ !’’

Nico is snapped back into reality by a sharp whisper to his right. Percy is looking at him desperately. 

‘’What the hell does she mean?’’ Percy whisper-yells, gesturing helplessly at his notes. Nico looks up at the board and tries to make his synapses fire at a speed faster than a mile per hour. 

No such luck. 

‘’I have  _ no  _ idea, dude. Sorry,’’ Nico replies, and Percy pouts. Nico looks down, fiddles with the edge of his paper. 

Hm.

Percy goes back to struggling, and Nico goes to sketching Percy’s eyes from memory on the corner of his page. It’s quick work, and Nico eventually finds himself with Percy leaning into his space, eyeing Nico’s drawing curiously. Nico flushes. 

‘’Wow,’’ Percy mumbles. ‘’That’s really good. Whose eyes are those?’’

Nico actually stares at Percy then, dumbfounded.

_ (how. . . how can a guy not recognize his own eyes? nico’s now equal parts concerned and confused.) _

Sometimes, Percy’s obliviousness is cute. Other times, it’s scary. This boy could probably have someone kiss him straight on the lips and still not know what the _ fuck  _ was going on. 

( _ percy doesn’t remember that night. or maybe he chose to forget.) _

‘’Um,’’ Nico flounders. ‘’Nobody’s?’’ He ends it like a question. Percy hums. 

‘’It’s pretty. I like it,’’ ( _ they’re yours, they’re your eyes, and they’re the prettiest thing I’ve ever seen,  _ some part of nico wants to scream, quite irrationally. he doesn’t.)

_ He’s probably said the same thing about Annabeth, and her goddamn equations, too, _ Nico then notes bitterly. 

He doesn’t say that, either. Instead, ‘’Thanks, Percy.’’

‘’No problem, dude.’’ And their knees go back to brushing, and Nico goes back to trying to go numb. 

Round and round and round the merry-go-round of misery and self-loathing. 

Nico hates it. 

The bell rings all too quickly and all too slow. Nico avoids Percy. The world is grey and monotonous, and Nico wants to go get high to shake it off. That’s how it usually is, anyway; it’s in such a rhythm now that it’s a song Nico can’t get out of his head.

When he gets home, he’s greeted by his dog, Ms. O’Leary, and nobody else. His parents must be out, then; Nico almost frowns at that. Loneliness seems much more familiar than anything else, now. 

Nico flops down onto his bed, turning on one of his more depressing playlists. He’s halfway into a bag of barbeque chips and a pile of self-loathing when a knock at his door interrupts his stupor; it’s not hard to guess who it is based on the brisque, but firm nature of the knock. 

‘’Jason.’’

Jason’s smiling, holding a box of pizza, backpack slung over his shoulder. Nico knows this game; Jason has art homework. Because Nico doesn’t have math homework Jason can help (read, _ do _ ) for him, Jason has to bribe Nico with pizza. 

This is their friendship. 

‘’Hey, Neeks —’’

‘’Pizza on the table.’’ Nico steps aside, unblocking the entryway, and that’s the closest Jason’s going to get to a greeting. Jason does as he’s told, Nico almost immediately diving into the box of pizza ( _ ‘’Dude, that’s meat-lovers with pineapple, how do you even eat it that fast?’’ ‘’Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to, Grace.’ _ ’). Jason’s art project is fairly simple; just a cubist portrait. But the man doesn’t have a single artistic bone in his body, and Nico has at least two. 

Nico starts to work out the sketch-lines for the project, as Jason looks at him quizzically. Mentally, Nico curses—for however unobservant Jason is, he always chooses the stupidest moments to realize that he, in fact, is a human being with human emotions and that other people have things going on, too. 

That in mind, it’s not surprising when Jason speaks. 

‘’Are you okay?’’

Eh. No, Nico’s really not, but this happens sometimes. Everything just... _ hits _ and Nico can’t shake off the feeling of everything being wrong and his skin being too tight. And when something happens often enough, it can’t really be considered something worth noting anymore. So,

‘’Yeah.’’ 

Jason doesn’t believe him, but Nico stuffs his face full of pizza and goes back to drawing, so Jason shuts up. Nico’s halfway done with Jason’s project (and the pizza) when the silence breaks. 

‘’Where’s Hazel?’’

Good question. Nico doesn’t know. 

‘’Probably off with Frank,’’ He says, spraying bacon crumbs over Jason’s half-finished project. Jason blinks. 

‘’Where are your parents?’’

_ Ah,  _ Nico gets it now. Jason’s trying to figure out if there’s some way he can leave and not have Nico be by himself. Jokes on him; Nico’s probably just gonna sleep, anyway, when Jason leaves. Well, sleep, or—

The door swings open with a bang that startles both Jason and Nico. 

At first, Nico doesn’t really process what he’s seeing; or rather, he doesn’t want to. 

Frank’s hand is splayed across Hazel’s small back, her arms tossed over his shoulders. Nico’s facing the back of Hazel’s head, and—

_ Oh.  _

_ (oh, absolutely  _ ** _not_ ** _ .  _ ** _fuck _ ** _ no.) _

The  _ idea  _ that his sister, Nico’s  _ little  _ sister, Hazel, is making out with  _ anybody  _ is enough to make Nico push his chair back, standing up in a hurry. The  _ fact  _ that she is making out with somebody, Frank, makes Nico shout in alarm and indignation. 

Hazel and Frank disentangle tongues quickly and remove their hands from each other. Nico glares at Frank with as much vehemence as he can muster, and Frank blushes to the tips of his ears. 

Hazel fans at her face, and Jason makes some kind of vaguely strangled noise. Nico wants to punch a wall. 

_ ‘’What _ ,’’ Nico chokes out. ‘’were you two  _ doing?’’ _

Silence is thick and heavy, as Ms. O’Leary paws at Frank’s foot. It makes for a funny scene, Nico’s sure. 

‘’Nico,’’ Hazel begins, in that placating way of hers. ‘’We were just—’’

Nico doesn’t give her time. ‘’ _ Out,  _ Frank.’’ He orders. Frank goes quickly, leaving Jason floundering in the Kitchen, Hazel blushing in the front room, and Nico glaring at the door. 

It makes sense, too; Hazel and Frank would have the house alone to themselves a lot. Nico had hoped that it wouldn’t have come to this, but. . .

‘’Hazel.’’

‘’We haven’t done anything! Just kissed, I swear!’’ She rushes out in one breath. Jason shifts uncomfortably. 

Nico steels himself. Hazel is fifteen; this is to be expected. Nico has to get used to it. 

(he doesn’t have control of this anymore.)

‘’Not. . . in the house. Ever. And use. . . protection.’’ It takes a monumental effort for Nico to choke the words out, and he calmly (robotically) slumps down in the chair. Hazel stutters. 

‘’O-okay,’’ She says, before scampering down to her room. Nico stares at the wall. 

‘’Should I, um, go?’’ Jason asks. Nico glares at him, then, and he seems to get the idea, sitting back down in his chair. 

(this is life now, then.)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> . . . sorry?


	3. wait a second, that's not quite right-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (???????)
> 
> Warning: Passing Mentions of self harm

Saturday finds Nico at an empty playground. 

(don’t laugh. that’s not funny.)

It comes with more of the need to get out of his house, more than anything else. It’s been raining for days, and, with everybody spending their free time at home, he needed to get out. 

(read; avoid hazel.)

(she won’t look him in the eyes.)

And Nico loves his sister, really, but there are some things he never needed nor wanted to know. 

Solution? 

Sit on a near-broken swing and listen to something angry one full-blast in his headphones. 

(it’s awful.)

Nico’s deep into the spiral of self-loathing and spite for the world when the swing next to him creaks. 

Saturday also finds Nico in a once empty playground, looking at Percy Jackson in shock. 

Whatever greeting Percy says is silent, through Nico’s music and Nico’s ‘masculine’ shriek. Percy is in a blue hoodie, Nowhersville high’s logo printed on it, above the words  _ Track Team.  _

(because why  _ wouldn’t  _ it be?)

Percy looks sweaty and shocked. Nico rips out his headphones. 

‘’Don’t  _ do  _ that to me,’’ He grumbles, embarrassment (among other things) painting his once-healthy-olive-skin-turned-grey in bright red. Percy frowns. 

‘’Sorry. I was just on my run, and I saw you. Thought I’d stop and say hi.’’

(because of course percy runs. why wouldn’t he? why wouldn’t this be hell?)

‘’. . . right,’’ Nico says, because, as always, the idea that Percy would willingly want to talk to him is so abstract that it might be a Pollock. 

‘’Anyway,’’’ Percy says, a little breathless as he smiles. ‘’What’s up with you?” And Nico gets distracted by the way that Percy’s muscles shift under his sweat-soaked shirt, how his big, warm-looking hands fidget with the cords of his headphones. 

‘’Uhm. . . ‘’ Nico tries to reign back in his lizard brain. ‘’Nothing. Why?”

‘’I was just wondering why you’re out here so early.’’

Oh. Yeah. Percy’s right to be curious; it’s 8 AM. Even Percy knows that, because, simply because of who Nico is, the likelihood that he’ll be out of bed by lunch on a weekend is slim. So slim, in fact, Nico think it might be 0 to -40. 

(nico’s never been good at math.)

(insomnia is a cruel thing.)

‘’I just wanted to get out of the house.’’ Nico tries to keep his eyes anywhere but Percy, but, alas, he finds himself looking Percy right in his pretty, sea green eyes. 

‘’Oh. Why?’’ 

(some things can’t be said aloud.)

‘’Boredom.’’ And it’s a half truth, because, yeah, Nico does get bored. Especially when he’s been awake since four in the morning, unable to fall back asleep, despite the meds he’s on. But it’s also the practically permanent sense of restlessness and unease he feels, crawling underneath his skin and threatening to break out. 

Percy hums, then, looking out at the trees. Nico looks at him.

(their entire damn relationship in a few seconds.)

‘’So, I wanted to ask you,’’ Percy begins.

Nico’s brain tries to process. 

(oh god. oh, good  _ fucking  _ god, he knows. he knows nico’s gay, he knows that nico has a crush on him, he has to know, oh god oh god _ oh god _ —)

‘’Do you like Annabeth?’’

Nico implodes. 

(what. the. fuck?!)

(???????)

(???!!!!!????)   
  


( _ caution: contents delicate! handle with care!) _

  
  


Nico panics. Annabeth? Who’s Annabeth? Why does he like her? Wait, Nico’s gay, he doesn’t like girls. Why does he like Annabeth? What’s going on? 

‘’Whoa, Nico, calm down—’’

‘’Yes!’’

Nico’s mouth works of it’s own volition, desperately trying to save him from the hell he’s created. His legs then decide it doesn’t like that response, so he jumps up. 

And runs. 

and runs. 

‘’Nico, wait!’’

and runs. 

  
  


And Nico runs till his legs turn to jelly, till he’s out of breath, and fearful, animal instincts are the only things left in his head, besides the chant of,  _ no no no no no no no. _

And he’s crying, definitely. Why? Fuck if Nico knows. 

(He Said He Liked Annabeth. Looked Straight Into Percy’s Eyes, And Said He Liked _ Annabeth.) _

(caution: contents combustible)

And when Nico looks up, he’s at the dreary old shack again, heart pounding in his throat. He’s alone, too. 

(salt in the wound.)

And Nico wants to scream. 

(the world always goes rose-colored-glass distorted like this. it’s being overwhelmed: nico can’t process, so he doesn’t. one minute, he’s breaking down, splintering,  _ cracking _ , and the next, he’s an impartial observer from the corner of the ceiling. 

it’s a nice thing. 

and nico doesn’t know when the shack became a hiding place, but that’s what it is now. 

a hiding place.

(he’s hiding)

(he’s hiding))

Not-Nico slumps down on one of the crates. His hands are shaky, a cut from a stray branch bleeding on his cheek. 

(annabeth? god. not only will percy think that he’s straight (when did he stop wishing that percy thought of him as straight?) he’ll hate nico, now. 

and that’s not even the worst of it. 

it’s the way jason will frown at him, sympathetic. ‘poor nico has a crush on a taken  _ woman’ _ .

(man.)

it’s the way hazel will treat him like glass, delicate. 

it’s the way reyna will shake her head, subtly. she knows he’s lying, after all. 

(it’s the way percy didn’t really try to run after him.)

(it’s the way that this won’t amount to anything.)

and nico can’t say that he corrected them. any of them.)

Not-Nico’s chest is heaving, face ashen and eyes glassy.

(this isn’t him.)

Not-Nico doesn’t realize that his world is collapsing around him, and nobody’s there to see it.

Not-Nico doesn’t realize that it doesn’t matter. 

Not-Nico doesn’t realize that it’s just rubble falling on rubble, because there was nothing there to start. 

Not-Nico is blissfully oblivious. 

When Nico comes to, Rango is nuzzling at his leg, purring. It’s afternoon, at least; judging by the way his stomach is growling. He has some missed calls from Jason, and that’s it. Nico will have to call him back. 

There’s a weird sense of calm that comes over him after one of his episodes; it always comes before he actually has to process his emotions. _ That’ll  _ be hell, Nico’s sure. 

Mentally, he does a checklist:

Intone: quiet. Good sign. 

Limbs: not numb anymore. Feel connected to his body. Probably his own, at least. 

Head: pounding. Nico feels nauseous.

Arms: clear. Few scratches from the trees, not a blade.

Blearily, Nico scratches Rango’s head. The cat mewls happily. 

‘’Hey, buddy. How you doin’?’’ Nico’s voice is hoarse and shaky, like he’s been screaming. He really hopes he hasn’t; that’d freak the locals out. ‘’I bet I look pretty awful, huh?” Nico weakly tries. Rago looks up at him with too-intelligent eyes.

Yeah, that seems about right. 

Nico stands, knees like jelly and head thudding in time to his heart. Rango meows at him again. 

‘’Yeah, I agree. This does suck.’’

And somehow, talking to a cat isn’t even the weirdest thing Nico had done that day. 

It was only one in the afternoon.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> 1- Nico refers to his inner voice (parentheses) as his 'Intone', to clarify. Typically, it'll be the most present during times of stress and the like. It's the most honest part of of Nico's head: what he's truly thinking, always. 
> 
> 2- y i k e s 
> 
> 3- (rude.)


	4. and also, i'm like, gay for u. no homo tho.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jason has too much time to think.

_ Jason’s known Nico for a long time. _

Mentally, he has a list:

-When Nico’s overwhelmed, he shuts down. Full stop; he’ll have the breakdown and process the emotions later, but in-the-moment, he rarely does. 

-He runs, when he’s scared. Flight in overdrive.

-He forgets himself. Often— apparently, Jason’s the only one who notices.

-Red rimmed eyes and hair that hasn’t seen water in days means it’s not a good week. Jason wishes he knew how to make it stop. 

-There’s always trepidation when he reaches for a pencil— from what little Jason’s seen of the drawings Nico keeps close to his chest, it’s because he can’t trust himself with them anymore.

-The panic attacks are lengthy and intense. 

-He needs to be grounded—he needs calm and familiar.

-Nico doesn’t talk much about his past. Jason can only guess, from the way he flinches away from touch. High-fives means a flinch and animal eyes, hugs means telegraphing movements and asking if it’s okay. 

-Nightmares. God, the nightmares. 

-He’s a perpetual insomniac. The guy hasn’t gotten more than six hours of straight sleep for as long as Jason’s known him.

-The scars. Nico’s not as good about hiding them as he thinks he is.

-God, he needs a fucking  _ therapist. _

-He doesn’t eat. Not enough to set off anyone’s alarm bells, at least, and Jason doesn’t know why.

_ -Nico thinks he’s oblivious. Jason’s not; he’s seen the way Nico looks at Percy. _

Jason’s careful at keeping the facade up. Nico knowing that Jason knows would cause him more stress; Jason’s made so much  _ progress,  _ and he and Nico are finally at a place where Nico’s letting him  _ in.  _ He can’t lose that, just to tell Nico he knows. 

And it’s easy. Nico makes it  _ easy  _ to believe he’s straight. 

It’s easy to mistake the way Nico looks at Annabeth as want and not jealousy. It’s easy to see how Nico tenses up when Percy’s around as annoyance, and not shame of wanting something he thinks he shouldn’t. It’s so goddamn  _ easy  _ to assume that the way Nico’s never dated anybody, or even expressed verbil interest, that it’s just an aloof kind of introversion.

But Jason, contrary to popular belief, is  _ not  _ stupid.

The way Nico looks at Percy when he thinks nobody’s looking; with soft eyes, full of hopelessness and what Jason can’t describe as anything other than love. 

And—well, Jason would know. He’s given that same look countless times, to oblivious receivers. 

And he still does. 

(Fuck.)

And what hurts most about it all is that—it’s well-practiced. Nico  _ wants  _ everyone to think he’s straight.  _ Needs  _ it. And Jason lets him,  _ plays along,  _ even. 

_ (‘’Aww, Nico. Who is _ ** _ she_ ** _ ?’’) _

God knows why. 

And, yeah, sometimes Jason wishes he didn’t. Sometimes, it twists Jason the wrong way, and he’s  _ this close, he could he could he could and maybe Nico actually _ —

Jason always stops those thoughts in their tracks.

But this?

‘’You. Did.  ** _What_ ** ?’’

Percy winces. 

‘’Man, I didn’t know he’d freak out like that!’’ Percy defends. Jason’s still having trouble wrapping his head around the whole situation. ‘’I just. Asked him. A question, which, by the way, he had no reason to freak out about.’’

Percy takes Jason’s steely silence as anger. Jason doesn’t blame him. He’s probably right.

‘’Listen, Jay, I don’t know him as well as you. I didn’t know that he would—’’ Percy cuts himself off with a pleading look at Jason.

Who, by the way, in 10,000% freaking out. 

Nico’s probably lost in the forest somewhere, having a panic attack, with nobody to help him. That’s  _ terrifying.  _ Nico shouldn’t even be having to deal with that in the first place, but  _ alone. _

Jason’s not willing to spare any more thought to that. 

‘’Just,’’ words, words that Jason will regret later, are about to come tumbling out. Jason stops them. ‘’Just, shut up and keep walking.’’ Percy stares down at his shoes like they have the answers to the universe, and does as he’s told. Jason tries to think; where could Nico have  _ gone _ ? Jason prays he didn’t go too deep. Myburn is scary as shit and nobody knows much about it, and Jason doesn’t think he’d ever forgive himself if—

Breathe. Stop thinking about it. Worrying helps nothing. 

They keep walking through the eerie silence of the forest, until they come to the old lot of dryers. Percy shudders. 

‘’Man, I hate this place.’’

Jason glares to remind him that the only reason they’re in ‘this place’ is because of  _ him.  _

Percy looks appropriately ashamed. It’s only satisfying to the barest, most primal degree, and Jason’s still trying not to deck the guy. 

The other part of Jason wants desperately to find Nico, wrap him up in the fluffiest duvet he can find, and shield him from the world. 

It’s a selfish hope. Nico, for everything he’s been through, is easily one of the strongest people Jason’s ever met. He doesn’t need protecting (therapy, yes, but not protection). That, and the fact that Nico is absolutely focused on other people (Hint: Starts with a P and ends with a Y, with the letters ERC in between) and Jason has a better chance with Octavian then he does with Nico di Angelo. 

Which is saying something, because the last interaction he had with Octavian was at the guy’s funeral, but whatever. 

‘’You know,’’ Percy starts, suddenly. ‘’I always kinda figured that he . . . y’know, liked her. But I never thought it was anything that serious.’’ 

Christ. Percy really thinks this is about  _ Annabeth _ , still. This boy could have somebody drag him behind the school to make out with him and he’d still refer to them as ‘buddy’. 

It’s not funny.

It’s terrifying. 

(Jason’s terrified for what Nico will have to, inevitably, face.)

‘’Percy,’’ Jason’s mouth is moving of its own volition. ‘’Have you ever stopped to consider that —’’ Jason doesn’t get to finish the thought he’ll definitely regret. 

That’s when he sees Nico.

It’s immediate, consuming relief. Nico doesn’t have any visible injuries, and while he looks shaken up, he doesn’t look to be in serious crises at the moment. He looks shocked to see them, and Jason barely registers Percy’s gasp. 

_ ‘’Nico _ !’’

Unwise as it is, Jason rushes forward, the urge to  _ protect protect protect  _ ending with Nico pressed against his chest in a bone-breaking hug. Nico squeaks. 

‘’Ugh,’’ he chokes out. ‘’Breathe, Jason. Please.’’ Jason obliges after one final squeeze, and Nico looks up at him, and he doesn’t get to hear what Nico says next. 

‘’Nico!’’

Fuck, it’s Percy. 

(If Jason had a nickel for every time he’d said that.)

Nico’s spine goes ramrod-straight at the sound of his voice. Jason can practically hear him slamming down his metal shutters and mentally retreating. 

‘’Oh,’’ Nico whispers. Percy runs forward. 

‘’Fuck, shit, I’m so sorry, dude, I didn’t think that— well, you know. It’s— chill, though, it’s fine. I mean—’’ Percy rambles on, and Nico’s eyes go glassy. He shoulders past both of them, quickly, and, in the stunned silence he leaves behind, murmurs into the fog. 

‘’You shouldn’t have bothered looking for me.’’ 

It’s quick, cold, and clinical. Jason moves to chase after Nico, but Percy’s hand on his shoulder stops him. ‘’Dude, let him go. We found him, we know he’s fine.’’

And Jason  _ snaps.  _

The punch is solid, and Jason gets a sick kind of satisfaction from the feeling of knuckles against skin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> h m m m m m .
> 
> wow, that reveal came early. yup, jason's gayly in love with a certain mr. di angelo. also, percy anf siudhsichsif
> 
> i know i'm making percy out to be kind of an asshole rn, but it [probably] won't stay that way. 
> 
> ''Are you fucking kidding me? I could carve my damn heart out for you, and it wouldn't fucking matter, [.......]!''


	5. is optimism a drug? 'cause i need a heavy dose

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Come to think, this might actually be funny, in the way that it's so damn sad.

Monday afternoon brings Nico to an office that smells like pine, sitting down in front of a man who’s paid to listen to Nico bitch about his life. 

It’s sorta funny, actually. 

‘’So, Nico,’’ Dr. Brule (yes, that’s the guys actual name), begins. Internally, Nico prepares for the interrogation. ‘’Tell me about your weekend.’’

The thing is, Dr. Brule knows what happened over Nico’s weekend. I mean, you can only go missing for so long, come home and have a panic attack, and refuse to go to school so much before somebody notices. That’s what this appointment is; normally, therapy is on saturdays. But this extra session? Well, everybody’s worried again.

(it’s always  _ again.) _

Nico and Dr. Brule are locked in a stare-down, silence heavy with challenge. This happens a lot, actually. Nico and Dr. Brule are equally stubborn. It’s a matter of who cracks first. 

Dr. Brule clears his throat. He’s not having it today. Nico takes that as a win.

‘’Can you tell me what triggered the panic attack?’’

In bulleted list format, Nico could. If he really wanted to, he could do an interpretive tap dance about what, precisely, caused it. But, he doesn’t, so he stays silent in an overly-stuffed faux-leather chair. Dr. Brule stares him down. 

‘’Do you not know, or do you just not want to tell me?’’

(‘’well, ya see, doc, i kinda told the guy i’m gayly in love with i actually like his girlfriend, like, romantically, and then i ran off into a spooky ass forest, whereupon i had a dissociative episode in a weed shack, where one of my only friends and the guy i love, you know, percy jackson? the guy who thinks i love his girlfriend? had to come look for me, and then, like an edgy ass bitch, i walked off dramatically into the fog, mumbling some shit about ‘you shouldn’t have come looking for me’ (because i might actually be a damn character from twilight, apparently) and i ran off, locked myself in my room, and proceeded to feel like i was dying for the next hour. anyway, how was your week, doc? ‘cause, man, i kinda felt like jumping off the nearest tall building, and the only reason i didn’t was cause’ i just didn’t have the energy, doc. i think i’m getting worse again, doc, ya’ feel? like, ‘they should lock me back up in the psych ward’ worse, doc. get it?’’)

‘’‘Dunno,’’ Nico eventually says. Dr. Brule blinks. 

‘’Okay,’’ He says, after a pause. ‘’Did you take your medication that day?’’

Nope. Nico definitely didn’t, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t stare at the bottles for ten minutes wishing he would. That day was just bound to be a disaster, anyway. 

‘’Yeah.’’

Dr. Brule levels him with a look that would make the most hardened of criminals spill their guts. Nico winces.

‘’No.’’

The doctor leans back in his chair, raising a suspiciously neat eyebrow. Dr. Brule has a husband, and Nico thinks it’s kinda funny that he can’t even tell Dr. Brule that he’s gay. 

‘’And why,’’ the timbre of his voice isn’t even that accusatory. ‘’Is that?’’

Nico rolls a few answers around on his tongue, twisting the ring on his finger and feeling a dull kind of remorse. Eventually, he settles on something that’s not even halfway there. ‘’ . . . ‘cause. I—it’s just, I dunno. I . . . they make me feel kinda—’’ The realization that he’s about to be actually honest is terrifying, and Nico cuts himself off. If he starts, he won’t be able to stop, and of all the dumb things he could say right now, his feelings, the reasons he’s not taking his meds, and how he wants to just ‘run off’ and never be found are in the top three things he would spill first.

Dr. Brule frowns. He’s lost the battle. 

‘’Nico, as I’ve said before, that’s not something you can do. If you want to lower your dosage, or stop taking medication completely, that is something you, your parents and I would have to talk about. However, right now, I think doing so would be counter-productive, and would strongly advise against it.’’

Hm.

Nico looks away. ‘’Yeah.’’

There’s another pause. ‘’How are things with Jason?’’

That’s Dr. Brule’s favorite conversation starter, and it’s definitely because he and hazel are the only two people Nico’s ever willing to talk about. In fact, Nico’s pretty sure Dr. Brule halfway suspects that he and Nico have  _ something  _ going on.  _ That’s  _ terrifying, but mostly because Nico’s not as bothered by that as he probably should be.

Ew. Actually dealing with deeply rooted feelings and fears that are weighing him down to an incredibly unhealthy extent.

‘’ . . . we’re fine.’’ No, they’re not. Nico’s been ghosting him since, ‘’the incident’’.

Another Eyebrow Raise paired with the infamous Lean Back. Nico’s fucked.

‘’Really? When was the last time you guys talked.’’ Nico considers just lying, but they still have another 40 minutes to their session. Ugh. 

‘’ . . .  _ saturday.’’ _

Dr. Brule leans forward, dark eyes alight with accomplishment. ‘’Really? How did that go?’’

Nico stares the doctor straight in his eyes. ‘’It was  _ fine.’’ _

Dr. Brule nods. ‘’Really? Tell me about that. What did you guys talk about?’’

Well, shit. There goes Nico’s plans of getting out of this with 1-5 word sentences.

‘’Life.’’ But damn if Nico isn’t gonna try. 

‘’Such as?’’

A pause, because Nico’s tired, he hasn’t showered in three days, and he’d rather be anywhere else but here. Nico thinks, in harsh contrast to earlier, that he could just spill everything, right here and now. Or sleep. Sleeping sounds good. Then, again, so does a dozen orange bottles spilled across a bathroom floor, all emptied out, but it’s been a bad week, and Nico’s desperately trying to fend the thought off. 

Which is ironic, because he’s in a fucking  _ therapists office,  _ but Nico’s sense of humor has always been strange. 

‘’He and Piper.’’

It spills out of Nico’s mouth like a bullfrog, ugly and too  _ there _ . Dr. Brule’s eyebrows climb to his hairline. 

_ ‘’Oh _ ?’’

The good doctor looks taken aback. Nico agrees. What the hell? He hadn’t thought about Piper in  _ forever _ (minus the time it took him to eat a double cheeseburger with fries, which was as much time Jason was willing to spend on the subject), much less talked about her. 

(well, fuck.)

(it happened over that summer. jason had showed up on nico’s doorstep, rain pouring, tear trails shocking their way down his face, and wordlessly (practically) fell on nico.

_ ‘’she,’’ jason began, haltingly, almost as burnt as nico. ‘’she said that it wasn’t gonna work out.’’ _

_ nico had hummed. jason, he had reasoned, was only there because leo had been in california for the week for a some reason nico couldn’t remember. that’s why he asked what he did. _

_ ‘’you loved her, huh?” everybody knew jason did. that’s why he was high off nico’s weed, and that’s why that was the first time nico had ever seen the untouchable jason grace cry.  _

_ ‘’i did. i really did. she doesn’t love me though. not . . . not anymore. she realized that i loved. . . you know what that feels like, nico? lovin’ somebody who doesn’t love you back? you know how that feels?’’ jason was crying again, silent tears that nico couldn’t comment on, looking at nico with something indecipherable. Nico sat there for a second, trying to decipher the disjointed sentence.  _

_ inhibitions lowered, then, nico had laughed, all dry grass and bitter medicine. ‘’you have no fucking idea, grace.’’ _

_ ‘’maybe i do, nico.’’ _

that sentence had terrified nico, but later, he just wrote it off. it didn’t mean anything.)

Dr. Brule blinks. ‘’What about? Last you told me, Jason was having some trouble getting over her.’’

‘’He was,’’ Nico agrees. This topic is mostly safe, and it fills up the time, so Nico doesn’t mind talking about her. He wracks his brain for anything new on the subject. ‘’She’s been avoiding him, still, though it’s kind of mutual.’’ 

‘’Hm.’’

They go on like that, Nico taking bits of truth and re-framing them, trying to make that day sound anything but awful. Coming to the end of the session, Dr. Brule fishes a paper out from one of his desk drawers.

‘’Nico,’’ he says, sliding the paper toward him. ‘’I think I mentioned this a few weeks ago, actually, but I finally got the paper,’’ 

At the top of the page, in bold script, the title reads  **Inter-State Art Competition. **

‘’I know that, as you’ve said before, actually engaging in art has been . . . challenging, for a while.’’ Nico reads down further.  ** _Prompt: Dreams_ ** . ‘’I want you to try and do this. I think it’ll be good for you.’’

There’s a shuffle as Nico picks up his backpack. He looks Dr. Brule in his dark eyes. ‘’Why?’’

Consideration, and then, it hits. ‘’I think you, Nico,  _ you  _ need to relearn how to create, instead of . . .  _ re-enact,’’ _

‘’What’s  _ that  _ s’posed to—’’

‘’—It means you need to put the past behind you, and look to the future.’’

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow. well. 
> 
> i'm kinda tempted to make the next chapter percy's pov, cause i've kinda made him out to be an asshole so far, and it's not really makin' sense. tell me what ya'll think. or maybe doing somethin' for nico's birthday.
> 
> thank you guys for all the awesome feedback recently!


	6. haha thanks, i hate it

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> He doesn't know why.

  
  


Tuesday finds Nico staring into the depths of Myeburn, for reasons unknown even to himself. 

The wind pushes a few strands of his hair into his face, and the chill of october digs its claws into him, leeching the heat from his body and making him shiver. 

He’s always cold, though, so he brushes it off, much in the same way he brushes off the food pushed in front of him by Reyna, or Jason, or Hazel, or his parents, or anybody at all. 

Nico rocks on the balls of his feet, considering. He didn’t have to go to school, today; nobody even tried to make him, because nobody wanted to deal with another one of his attacks. So, he did what any unreasonable, angry, sad teenager would when presented with free time did; 

That is to say, he was spending it staring at a bunch of trees for absolutely no reason. 

(this is where  _ he  _ was found. a volunteer ranger found it. a highschooler, one of his  _ classmates _ , no less, and this is where it was.

if nico ever does, he’s promised himself it won’t be here. hazel volunteers in the summer, and he can’t ruin that for her.)

The thought weighs on Nico, and he presses his jacket closer to his body. 

Onward, then, he guesses. 

His boots, strangely enough, don’t follow the path to the shack, this time. As Nico goes further into the unexplored depths, the trees seem to crowd coser, and less dim sunlight filters through their tops. If Nico didn’t think he knew better, he’d even say it feels malevolent. Cold. Maybe even—

A meow startles him, and Nico spins around wildly, only to find that, Rango, bless it’s otherworldly soul (or lack thereof), is sitting there.

‘’Shit,’’ he whispers, pressing a hand to his arm. ‘’You scared me, buddy.’’ 

Rango trots forward, pressing it’s soft little head against Nico’s leg and purring. Nico crouches, and scratches at its ears. 

Nico hums, before standing up. Rango meows, urgently. Nico looks down at it. 

‘’What?’’

Rango turns toward the direction Nico came, and looks back with what looks like expectance. Nico blinks.

‘’Uhm . . . ‘’ Rango meows again, and, baffled, Nico shrugs. ‘’I’m going this way.’’ He points behind him. 

To illustrate the point further, Nico turns and begins to stroll deeper into the forest. Rango keeps meowing behind him, and Nico finds a fuzzy little head pressed into the back of his calf. 

‘’Dude,’’ he says, turning to the cat. ‘’I don’t know what—’’

The cat isn’t there. 

Trees that look more like men in cloaks looming press in, and the forest seems to get much, much darker. There’s no more wind, but it seems to get even colder.

Nico’s teeth begin to chatter, and his voice sounds small and muted when he asks, ‘’Rango?’’

Terror sets in as an arpeggio of ice against his spine, ripping and sudden.

What Nico might have once said was the rustling of leaves is the only response, and Nico spins frantically around. 

The forest is dark, and his back always feels exposed, no matter which way he turns. Fear is all-consuming, as he shakily flicks open his knife.

_ That does no good against the dark,  _ a voice seems to whisper in Nico’s head. Nico’s never heard it before. 

He’s running before he can think. 

Stray branches tear at his jacket, arms, and face, as Nico risks twisting his ankle on gnarled branches. The way he came in seems so different, now, and Nico thinks the trees have moved.

He tries not to think.that maybe, the way he’s come in isn’t the way he’s going out.

Panic is blinding, and Nico flails wildly as he connects with something strong and solid, unmoving. Nico squirms away, and looks up, only to find . . ..

A person?

‘’Whoa!’’ The boy exclaims, stumbling back. ‘’Jesus christ, are you okay?’’

The boy, Nico then realizes, is no one other than William I-Might-Actually-Be-Perfect Solace. 

Nico sputters, both in confusion and still-there fear, and Will crouches down. 

‘’Hey, calm down,’’ he says, and Nico pushes himself back. ‘’It’s okay, I’m not going to hurt you.’’ 

Nico blinks, rapidly, and says something to the effect of  _ forest-scary-what-help _ , and Will raises both hands in a placating gesture. ‘’It’s okay, calm down. Can you tell me what happened?’’

Nico shakes his head, and brings a hand up to push his hair out of his face. ‘’What—did you see—where?’’ The words come out shaky and broken, and Nico’s still trying to catch his breath. Will frowns. 

‘’I didn’t see anything. Are you sure you’re okay?’’ Nico swallows, before he looks back at the forest. It looks innocent enough. 

‘’Yeah,’’ Nico decides. ‘’Yeah, I guess I’m okay.’’ 

Will looks dubious, but he offers a hand to Nico anyway. Timidly, Nico takes it, fully  _ not  _ expecting to be pulled up, and, yet again, he collides with Will’s chest. 

‘’Whoa, easy there,’’ And Nico then realizes that no, the pull wasn’t what caused him falling against Will’s chest, his knees buckled and he fell. 

He’s shaking. 

Will grips Nico by his forearms, and Nico pushes away. ‘’I’m fine—’’ And his knees give again, body trembling, and Will rushes forward. 

‘’Clearly,’’ And some tiny, indignant part of Nico still manages to be mad at being treated like something  _ delicate.  _ His body, however, obligingly gives and sinks into Will’s hold. ‘’Christ, you’re freezing! What the hell are you doing out here, anyway?’’ Nico’s hands scrabble at Will’s upper arms, and a warm hand settles on his back as they sink to the ground together.

‘’I was,’’ (what was he doing?) ‘’ . . .Something important.’’

‘’Like getting a cold?’’ Will deadpans, and Nico doesn’t have the energy to even refute that. Will scoffs. ‘’Okay, then, di Angelo. You’re freezing and clearly in no shape to be walking, so I’m driving you home.’’

Nico freezes.

_ ‘’What?’’ _

‘’I said—’’

‘’No, you’re  _ not.  _ I’m fine!’’ Nico protests, trying to push away again, only to collapse halfway through. Will blinks. 

‘’Obviously.’’

‘’Yeah,’’ Nico grunts, pushing himself up on his forearms. Will’s mouth presses thin. ‘’Now, if you’ll excuse me—’’ Nico tries to stand. Bad idea. ‘’—Shit!’’

His ankle is his downfall, this time, and apparently, in the adrenaline of the moment, he hadn’t realized he’d sprained it. Will’s eyes go wide and, for what might be the fourth time in their short little acquaintance, has to rush to catch Nico.

‘’I think you sprained it,’’ Will says, and it’s only because of the pain that Nico doesn’t point out that,  _ oh, you think?  _ ‘’Looks like I will be driving you after all.’’

Nico’s anxiety flares at the idea of doing so, but besides calling Jason (no) he literally has  _ no other options. _

In lieu of a response, Nico just goes limp in Will’s arms, scowling. ‘’Fine. Sure. Just don’t—’’ And Will then proceeds to pick him up, bridal-style, and begins to carry him.

‘’Hey!’’ Nico screeches. ‘’Put me down! I can walk!’’ 

Will snorts, and continues to walk. ‘’Not unless you want to end up in the ER,  _ sunshine.’’  _ The patronizing makes Nico scowl further, and regret begins to sink in. If he weren’t so rattled, he’s sure he’d never of agreed to this. 

As the forest disappears behind them, though, Nico can’t help but feel relieved

‘’Here we are,’’ Will proclaims cheerily after a short walk. 

No fucking way. 

  
‘’I am  _ not  _ getting in that  _ monstrosity.’’ _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i feel like this shit's plot has gotten thinner than the one for twilight, but like, pls validate me if i'm wrong, i guess.


	7. a truck to put all highlighters to shame

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> nico kind of wants to cry, the moment he see's it.

  
  


Said monstrosity; obnoxiously yellow truck.  _ Goddamn _ , the thing wouldn’t be out of place at a  _ rave.  _ Why? Why in gods name would anyone . . . ? Just, why?

‘’She’s not as bad as she looks,’’ Will assures, continuing to walk toward the driving offense to all highlighters. ‘’It used to be my dad’s.’’ Will is apparently oblivious to the way Nico is staring at the truck in slack-jawed horror, legitimately considering taking his chances against the elements of nowheresville, Ohio.

‘’Absolutely not. I refuse. You’ll have to kill me.’’

Will laughs. ‘’It’s this or an ambulance.’’

‘’I’ll take neither, thank you.’’

Will stops in front of the passenger side door, and struggles with the handle for all of a minute, Nico refusing to help out of pure spite. When it does open, however, Will sets Nico facing out instead of actually inside the car. He kneels.

‘’I’m just gonna check and make sure it’s not broken and that I don’t have to drive you straight to the ER.’’ Will gently takes Nico’s left leg, and Nico thinks that this is probably a weird encounter to have with a near-stranger. He begins to roll Nico’s muddy pant leg up,  and, for all the exhaustion currently washing over Nico, he still tries to stop him. 

‘’It’s fine,’’ He insists, wise enough to not jerk his ankle out of Will’s gentle grasp, but it’s a near thing. ‘’It’s just a sprain, I can —’’ He cuts off with a cry of pain, and Will looks up at him, shocked. 

‘’Did that hurt?’’ He asks, pointing to the spot he had prodded at and making Nico flinch violently. 

‘’Not at all,’’ Nico pants. ‘’What would give you that impression?’’

Will frowns, and slips Nico’s shoe off, like some inverse prince charming. Nico feels less than flattered. 

‘’Uhm . . . I think you . . . broke it?’’ Will doesn’t sound so sure. Nico cranes his head to look down at it, only to be obscured by Will’s head. ‘’But how did you run on it, then? Didn’t it hurt?”

(adrenaline? sheer terror? the pain is throbbing and awful, now, but nico doesn’t remember it doing that in the forest.)

Nico shrugs. ‘’Luck?’’

Will looks up at him. ‘’I dunno. Maybe you actually . . . broke it? Back there, when you try to stand? It looked like it twisted pretty badly, but I don’t think . . .’’ Will looks, and  _ sounds _ , absolutely baffled. Nico concures, but thinking about it means drawing explanations he doesn’t want to. 

‘’How do you know all this, anyway?’’

Will goes to looking back down at the break. ‘’My dads a doctor.’’

‘’A doctor that drives a bright yellow truck?’’

‘’Shouldn’t you be screaming in pain, right now?’’

Nico’s trying to distract himself, but now that Will mentions it, yeah, maybe screaming in pain would be nice.

‘’Okay,’’ Will decides. ‘’I’m not going to touch it anymore, but I think you should go straight to the ER. Do you have somebody you could call that could meet you there? Anybody you could call?’’

‘’Yeah, I guess.’’ Nico mumbles. (‘’why were you out there? you can’t  _ do  _ that, nico, what would your sister say—’’). ‘’I’ll call . . . my parents.’’ Because the ER will call them anyway, and, at this point, protesting is useless. He can’t walk home and they’d find out eventually, no matter what he does. 

Will nods, rolls down Nico’s pant leg and helps Nico maneuver his now-useless leg properly into the car. Nico flushes under his care; he’s not used to having so much careful, positive attention directed at him for so long. Either Will doesn’t notice it or he’s too polite to mention it. 

Will settles into the driver’s seat, and starts the engine. The radio starts, and . . .

is . . . that . . .  _ country? _

(just put nico out of his misery, please.)

‘’Oh, god,’’ Nico says, throwing an arm over his face and trying to ignore the throbbing, visceral pain in his ankle. ‘’Just kill me now, please.’’

‘’Absolutely not!’’ Will chirps, turning the music up further. ‘’Sorry, emo boy. My car, my rules.’’

Nico removes his arm to glare. ‘’I’m not emo.’’

Will pulls out of his parking spot, and laughs. ‘’Totally,’’

Nico throws his head back against the headrest, and tries not to throw up or pass out. This isn’t the first time he’s broken a bone, sure. He broke his arm in the 2nd grade, falling off the top of a slide, but even then, he swears it didn’t feel this bad. After a minute, Nico decides it’d be best he actually does call his parents, before he really does pass out of throw up. 

When the interview begins, Nico is ready for it . 

Q: What’s up? Why are you calling?

A: Oh, hey. So, long story. I was taking a walk in Myeburn—

Q: Why on earth would you be doing that?

A: I just . . . needed to clear my head. But, anyway—

Q: What were you doing out there?

A: Not drugs, calm down. I just needed a walk,  _ geez _ . I kind of—

Q: I didn’t say you were doing drugs. We’re just worried about you. A text that you were going out wouldn’t have hurt. What would have happened in an emergency?

A: I know, I know, I’m sorry. But could you just listen for a—

Q: We just want you to be safe, Nico. You need to talk us. Why don’t you talk to us more?

A: Christ, I  _ know.  _ But, seriously, I broke—

(will’s giving him a concerned look. nico’s panicking.)

Q: We need to have a talk later. Where are you right now?

A: In a car, but—

Q: A car?! What are you doing in a car? Where are you? I’m coming to pick you up—

A: I broke my ankle!  _ Jesus _ , I’m in a car on the way the the ER because I broke my ankle. I ran into this kid from my class, he’s driving me to the ER right now. His name is Will. 

Q: . . . you broke . . . your ankle?

A: Yeah. I was running, ‘cause I got spooked by an . . . owl, and I twisted it on something. Will was there, and he took a look on it. He can’t be sure, but he thinks I broke it. I’m sorry I didn’t call you earlier, but I was kind of distracted. 

Q: . . . oh. Are you okay?

A: Obviously not. But can you meet me there?

Q: Yeah, of course. I’ll call David, then. Do you want me to call Hazel, too?

A: No, I don’t want to worry her. It’s just a broken ankle, I’m not dying. 

Nico hangs up after a few more short words, and the promise of A Talk, later. He throws his phone down, and buries his face in his hands.  _ Christ.  _

‘’Damn. That didn’t sound fun.’’

Nico jumps. In the heat of the moment, he had almost forgotten Will was in the car. Nico shakes his head. 

‘’They just worry,’’ 

Will hums. ‘’Yeah, I get that. When I first started visiting my dad every other week, my mom would call me. Like, every two minutes.’’ Nico blinks up at Will. ‘’It was even worse when I started driving. She was always freaking out.’’

Nico frowns. ‘’Your parents are . . . separated?’’

(looking at will, you definitely would  _ not  _ guess that. he’s . . . he seems too perfect. nothing is supposed to go wrong in pretty people's lives. not really.)

Will nods. ‘’As of six years ago, yeah, they’re divorced. What about yours? Your parents still together?’’

There’s the question. Nico looks out the window.

‘’I’m . . . adopted.’’

_ ‘’Oh.’’ _

Silence befalls them, for a moment, before Will inhales, just a little sharply. ‘’That’s . . . cool? Some of my siblings are adopted. They’re cool. I think adoption is good. Like, you know. It’s super chill. And—shit, I’m rambling. Sorry.’’ Will flushes, frowning. Nico shrugs.

‘’It’s okay.’’

(jesus, this is awkward.)

(he’s not talking. why isn’t he talking? somebody has to talk. this is awful. nico should’ve just stayed in the forest and accepted his fate. anything would be better than this.)

(oh god why is the er so damn far away—)

‘’We’re here.’’

  
(thank  _ fuck.) _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ngl, i kind of . . . dislike??? this chapter. idk. feels rushed, even tho i took forever on it :(. tell me what u think!

**Author's Note:**

> Kudo's, comments, and the like are always wanted and appreciated. 
> 
> Some things to explain: 
> 
> Percy is mixed (brazilian and white, poseidon being brazilian and sally being white). this is a personal hc, but if you don't like that, don't read. 
> 
> nico and hazel were both adopted by the same people, nico being about twelve (bianca dies when Nico is eleven, in this universe). hazel and nico having lived together since Nico was ten. 
> 
> nico was an immigrant from Italy, along with Bianca and his mother at age nine. he grew up primarily speaking Italian, and while he had a fairly good command of english by the time he had started middle school, he still had a strong Italian accent.
> 
> In this au, jason, percy, annabeth, frank, piper, reyna and thalia are all seventeen. they're juniors (with the exception of thalia, who's a senior) with nico being sixteen and a sophomore, along with leo and will, hazel being 15 and a freshman. this is in order to make them all fit into high school nice and neat, not in order to reduce age-gaps. 
> 
> ''What are you?"  
''Only whatever you think I am.''


End file.
